At our local mall, they have a great tot lot that my daughter LOVES! They have these crazy things she can climb on, a slide (her favorite, of course) and a spongy, bouncy floor. On rainy or yucky days when the park won’t do, this is are go to. I brought her there yesterday just to get out of the house and that’s where we encountered our first bully.
Here in Florida, all the kids are on spring break so the tot lot was a mad house! Jammed packed with kids running, jumping, pretty much doing any and everything with every ounce of energy they had in their tiny bodies. Against my better judgement and the fact that she already spotted the play area, I let her play. It was going fine, I kept my eye on her as she ran around and interacted with all the kids. It even made me feel good seeing older kids helping her and giving her space while it took her a bit longer to climb up all the obstacles. But I was still on edge.
Another mom who was sitting next me was feeling the same way and we quickly bonded. Our kids were the same age and we were trying to be as cautious as we could amongst the sea of kids. We first noticed one little girl who was a bit older running up to kids and screaming in their faces. OK, a tad weird but that’s what some kids do. Then we noticed the same little girl knocking down and pushing kids off the 3 stairs to the slide. Now that is not OK in my book. Me and my new mom friend both noticed the incident then noticed her mom, who was sitting pretty on the bench glued to her iPhone. The little girl kept pushing and being aggressive with other kids, until she made someone cry, then the mom looked up from her – what I can only guess to be – VERY important text to say, “(Childs Name), no pushing!”. Then went quickly back to texting. As we watched this and how un-phased the little girl was with her mothers “reprimanding”, she found her next victim not minutes later, none only than the mom who was sitting next to me’s son. She knocked the poor kid into a wall and he went into hysterics! I gasped and the mom darted to her sons side and immediately left. You must be wondering what the mom did then, right? Just continued to sit on her big ol’booty and eyes memorized by her iPhone screen. Must have been updating her Facebook status this time.
I should have followed my new mom friend but I let Ava finish playing, she was having too much fun running in circles and sliding down the slide. Until it was her doom to meet the little girl face to face. She was minding her own business pretending to fly a space ship when this little girl climbed up and said “GET OFF THIS IS MINE!” and proceeded to push her off this space ship thingy. Poor thing went flying and bounced off on her ass! I freaked out and did exactly what my mom friend did. But as I left I said “Please don’t push”. The little girl looked at me like, who the fuck are you, bitch?!, flipped her long curly hair and pranced away to her next victim. This was all steps away from the mom who still didn’t move her eye balls from her phone.
Now, I am in no shape to judge another parent on their parenting skills nor do I think I know better than anyone, but what I do know is children getting physical with another child is wrong and I teach my daughter that very thing. It infuriates me that this woman just sat there, pretty much allowing her daughter to ‘bully’ and push around other kids with no repercussions. Then to have the balls to just sit there while multiple acts are going on, too busy texting or doing whatever the hell it is she was doing on her phone. So her child was basically unsupervised.
I choose to teach my daughter right and wrong and that if you do something wrong, there will be repercussions to her actions. I just can’t seem to wrap my head around parents who neglect this simple yet fair rule. I know this won’t be the last time we encounter a bully or a mom like this, but this was the first time my sweet little girl got a taste of the real life out there and I just wanted to keep her in her innocent bubble just a while longer. I know it wasn’t this little girls fault 100%, she is just a child and needs to learn boundaries, rules and the difference between right and wrong. The one person who should be teaching her that was too busy texting. It’s a damn shame that this is what our world is coming to. Learn to keep your eyes on your kid and iPhone in your bag! Texts, Facebook, e-mails can wait, especially when you are supposed to be spending time with your children.
BLAH! Sorry for the rant, but I just don’t get some people out there…..and probably never will!
Do you teach your child about repercussions to bad behavior? Has your child encountered a bully or a mom like this? Any advice on how to handle it for us first time moms?
– Amanda
